getting ready for oscar. a cocktail is not a cocktail if it has cream in it. a cocktail with cream in it is a milkshake.

watching the Oscars with Al

You know, I’ve been reading a lot about all these fancy cocktails they’ve been busy inventing for the Oscar parties this year and frankly who wants to drink something named after some one who sawed his arm off with a piece of twine or something.  I seriously could not go see that movie because I knew I’d have a seizure or something if I did. Plus, James Franco is back on GH playing a murderous psycho for a couple of weeks so I’m geting my Franco fix there for the time being.

And then, it’s all Black Swan this and Black Swan that!  Not that I did not love that movie, it was crazier than Mommy Dearest!  No matter what Wolfgang Puck says I am not drinking a cocktail with cream in it.  A cocktail with cream in it is not cocktail.  A cocktail with cream in it is a milkshake.  And another thing, once you have a line of frozen foods in the supermarket, unless that supermarket happens to be the Whole Foods, you may no longer call yourself a chef.

When it comes to Hollywood and cocktails I am old school.  Unless you’re the Coen brothers, I do not want to see a remake of Jaws or The Great Gatsby or The Wizard of OZ.  If you make me a Manhattan, it had better be made with rye.  Do not tell me rye and bourbon are the same thing- they are not.  It’s just like when people say “well semi-sweet chocolate and bitter-sweet chocolate are the same thing.” NO, they are not.

Gosh, I sound so bossy!   Well, anyhow, here are some old school libations followed by some new school nibbles to celebrate OSCAR-

America's Sweetheart, Mary Pickford

This is Mary Pickford. Isn’t she lovely? She was one of the greats among the first generation of silent movie stars.  She was a co-founder of United Artists Film Studios AND she was one of the 36 founding members of the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences…. hello, THE OSCARS!!!

The Mary Pickford Cocktail

from Old Mr. Boston De Luxe Official Bartender’s Guide, copyright 1935

Created in the 1920’s in tribute to one of the greats among the first generation of silent movie stars.

Into an ice filled cocktail shaker mix:

1&1/2 oz. white rum

1&1/2 oz. pineapple juice ( I strongly suggest using fresh pineapple juice which you should  strain)

1/4 teaspoon grenadine

a dash of maraschino liqueur (a must for this cocktail)

Shake it baby, shake it!  Strain into a cocktail glass filled with crushed ice. Garnish with cocktail cherry.

Call Me Elizabeth

17 year old Elizabeth Taylor

The first time I saw this photo I was 15 years old sitting in my high school library.  I know, you see this photo and you just take a breath inward, don’t you?  Really.  Now let’s get shallow and catty, shall we.  I know it’s wrong- but I can’t help it…Ok, it’s all like Angelina this, Angelina that!  She adopts babies, she steals husbands, she wore a vial of Billy Bob Thorton’s blood around her neck, gross!  And, she made out with her brother, ewww!  She’s THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN EVER IN THE WHOLE WORLD EVER.  Well, I say whatever. Please.  Now, I know I am more than partial to my Elizabeth, she does NOT like to be called Liz, but seriously look at that photo!!  Angelina should go put two paper bags over her head in case one breaks.

Call Me Elizabeth

courtesy of me

This is a pale violet colored cocktail in honor of the color of Miss Taylor’s beautiful eyes!

Into a champagne flute pour 1 oz. Creme de Violette sprinkle with edible gold leaf, top off with ice cold brut champagne.

Colin Firth

I’m kidding, that’s George, George the VI.

It’s all about the Brits and the Brits are a bunch of sots who like their gin.  So let’s go with a classic martini with added pizazz!  After all, we are celebrating!

Into an ice filled cocktail shaker pour:

2 oz. stone-cold Bombay Saphire Gin

1/2 an oz. dry vermouth

Shake it!!!!

Pour into a chilled cocktail glass over one of those GIANT olives stuffed with blue cheese!  CHEERS!!!

Rooster don't drink no damn White Russians!

The Rooster

courtesy of me

Get your self a pint sized glass, fill it with ice, pour Jack Daniels over it, have a cigarette- pray Jeff Bridges wins another Oscar.

Moving on,  Nibbles-

You know it’s Oscar night, live a little-  Truffled Popcorn:

6 servings

In a small pan melt 6 Tablespoons unsalted butter and 1 teaspoon white truffle oil

In a large, heavy pot, heat 3TBLSPs of vegetable oil, add one cup popcorn kernels, cover and cook over moderate heat until they start popping.  Keep shaking the popcorn over the heat non-stop, until the popping almost stops.  Pour into a large bowl, add the truffle butter, season with salt and freshly ground black pepper- serve!

Marinated Olives

1 pound of assorted olives-  get pitted olives, especially if you’re drinking.  Seriously, who needs to lose a tooth or ruin perfectly good dental work on Oscar night.

Put the olives in a good sized bowl, give them a nice drizzle or two of olive oil- toss about.

Add 3 or 4 cloves of crushed garlic,  sprinkle some hot red pepper flakes (to your taste) on them, sprinkle with some time, some rosemary, grate a little lemon and orange zest over them- let them sit in the fridge and marinate for as long as you can, then toss them in a cast iron skillet turn the burner on medium and toss them about until they’re warmed thru- serve promptly!

Sweet and Spicy Nuts

2 cups unsalted mixed nuts

1&1/2 TBLSPs unsalted butter

2 TBLSPs firmly packed brown sugar

1&1/2 TBLSPs white sugar

1/2 tsp cayenne pepper

1/2 tsp freshly ground black pepper

1 tsp salt

Line a cookie sheet or rimmed sheet with tinfoil or parchment paper

In a small bowl mix the sugars, peppers and salt together.  Omit the peppers if you just want the nuts to be sweet.

In a heavy skillet cook the nuts in butter over medium heat, stirring for 2 minutes or so- then sprinkle the bowl of sugar and spices over the nuts- cook and stir constantly until the sugar caramelizes and pretty much coats the nuts. Transfer nuts to prepared pan and cool- break nuts apart. serve.

Go out and buy some chocolate truffles to serve too!!!

I am dying, DYING to see who’s wearing who!!!